Tuesday, 14 August 2012

Gutter Politics and the waning of Democracy


It’s probably fair to say that one of the most competent Governments in Europe, if not the world today, is Italy’s. Never minds its chronic economic woes, Italy’s actual Government is skilled, professional, sensible and focused…and it’s unelected. Following the circus that passed for Berlusconi’s rule, Italy is now governed by a Brussels imposed state of technocrats with (thus far) seemingly no political ambitions, but charged only with trying to stop the country from disappearing down the southern European plug hole. This situation follows the embarrassing reality that, by following a normal democratic process, Italians could not have elected even a demi-semi sensible set of politicians. Their democracy has become and remains broken.

It’s nearing that point in Greece too. They have a chaotically riven and weak coalition of the corrupt and discredited to see them through an economic crisis that seems destined only to end it absolute failure. Whether modern democracy in the world’s “oldest democracy” will survive in the short term is no longer certain. Their crisis is, in significant part, a failure of a corrupted and abused electoral system.

Elsewhere democracy stumbles and trips to a different tune. In the USA, the quadquennial mudslinging begins, where electoral success, and the triumph of democracy has a near direct link with the most successful fund raiser and telegenic candidate.  It’s a case of who has the most money to stoop the lowest to conquer. Arguably its democracy in action, yet the current contenders plumb new depths. Obama perhaps ranks first amongst those who promises-to-delivery deficit is the greatest in American history – a case perhaps of “Yes, I can’t”. It is by no means certain either that, should Romney win, he would fare any better. 

In the UK democracy faces a different challenge. Our media hungry politicians are being devoured by the beast they have sought out and invited into their lives. Britain’s highly politicised media apply relentless, microscopic, high volume scrutiny to their every breath and twitch. All of it is amplified through the dark prism of their bias and manufactured to feed the morning headline diets of their readers, sowing despair and confusion in equal measure. But therein lies part of the problem – for politicians now, every day is an election campaign and a contest to secure good ratings.

A case in point is Prime minister’s weekly question time. Embarrassing broadcasts originally meant to demonstrate accountable democracy in action, instead reveal what could pass for an oversized cage of shrieking monkeys. Shouting obscenities, pulling faces and displaying, in a sense, their private parts for an increasingly disenchanted electorate to behold, it’s no surprise that politicians are held in such low esteem.

Elsewhere the ghosts of democracy haunt the political landscapes of less fortunate countries. Russian democracy seems only to exist to elect President Putin or one he has anointed to look after him and his business cronies. The same applies in Zimbabwe which is a democracy that has only ever had one or two free elections in over 40 years. In democratic terms, Mugabe is the absolute “President with no clothes” threatening his impoverished people with “another 5 years” of grinding despair and famine. Elsewhere, Iran’s rulers unsuccessfully seek to apply a green tinged veneer of respectability to a theocratic dictatorship.
In South Africa, the ANC says it is a staunch supporter of democracy. However, just how staunch it would feel about this noble principle if its election prospects were ever called in doubt by another party is questionable. A predictable change of heart and re-ordering of priorities could well be on the cards, after all it has said it will stay in power till the second coming of Christ. Whilst this might please its (optimistically expectant) Christian supporters, what is left unspoken is what it might do if any other parties threaten its holy reign before the much awaited event comes to pass, currently outstanding 2000 years and counting….

It seems we are all part of the scam, where with electoral nods and winks, we listen to the lies we are told by the campaigners. They know that we know that they cannot fulfil their promises, but we all "know"it’s the best option around. As Churchill said in 1947, “It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all those other forms that have been tried from time to time”.

Yet the world has become incredibly more complicated. The challenges that face a nation and its leaders are much more complex that they were in Churchill’s time. We look back at great leaders like him, and wonder why they are none of that calibre today. However, perhaps faced with the world’s incredible complexity today, Churchill would not have fared much better that his current contemporaries.

Our politicians seem to be raised as a special breed, without enough of them having graduated from the school of hard knocks, or being absolute stars in their field. Italy’s unelected prime minister appointed himself as unelected minister of finance and the economy. Nobody minded, because he is also a Professor of economics; perhaps there was relief that the post was finally filled by an expert on the subject, a rare event in politics.

National and international events move at great speed. The financial and economic structures that underpin a country’s prosperity are now so complicated, interwoven and out of control, it’s questionable if anyone truly understands the forces at work, least of all the politicians. It’s an increasingly interconnected world too, of shifting nations, peoples and wealth that have long bypassed the rhetoric of lazy politicians trying to sell the illusion of keeping promises made in past years but now rendered void by a changed world.

Added to this is a phenomenal new feature of the 21 century – the digital revolution, which given its exponential rate of change, will ironically always seem to be in its infancy. One of the most potent manifestations of this revolution is the internet, where reality and truth have been so spun and twisted in the centrifuges of mass, instant and near-infinite on-line identities, that it’s impossible to know what is believable or real any more. Politicians are being rendered obsolete, slow and reactive to events beyond the control of governments or nations.

This is just a snapshot of the challenge. Our world is one of rapidly accelerating technological sophistication, perhaps now already beyond the comprehension of us as individuals. So, whilst there is no alternative acceptable to democracy, our current concept of democracy increasingly resembles a tiger-moth biplane in a race of supersonic jet fighters. And, unless we find some way to upgrade how democracy and governments function in the new age, then, like the tiger moth, they will more probably than not be doomed to “museumhood”……

Saturday, 21 July 2012

PUTIN - NOT A PUNK ROCK FAN?

Recent events must be striking a rather sour note for Russian president Vladimir Putin. Having recently “won” a second term, it’s not all going quite according to the script. In fact, it’s all going a bit pear shaped.

First time, Putin cast himself as the strongman bringing stability and prosperity to Russia after the drunken chaos of the final Yeltsin years.  After two terms he had to stand down, so he orchestrated it that his protégé, Dmitry Medvedev, replaced him. After a bothersome few year languishing as PM, Putin prepared for his comeback. And that’s when script and reality parted ways.

First Vlad launched his comeback campaign with a bit of PR. Bad move. To start with, Vlad unintentionally albeit hilariously, turned himself into a gay icon by posing bare-chested atop a fine stallion ostensibly whilst on holiday (the intention of striking a heroic tough man pose falling flat). This was followed by further silly gaffs – Vlad the Black Belt winning a Karate competition as competitors conveniently fell over their own feet, Vlad the mean Hell's Angel riding a harley, and Vlad the ping pong demon, beating the hapless Medvedev at table tennis. This was topped off with a ridiculous stunt where Vlad the Diver discovered two ancient Greek urns whilst diving in the Black Sea. A beaming Vlad posed, emerging from the water, with his two chipped and broken old jugs, not dissimilar to those mass produced large faux-Grecian flower pots available at most garden markets. Not very presidential…

Next came the 2012 presidential election. Putin on the campaign trail alternated between the maudlin shedding of tears and wittering on about how much he loved Russia and appearing stony faced in response to the massed demonstrations against him by…er… thousands of others who loved Russia.
This would not do - clearly the masses were getting above themselves. So, as soon as he was re-elected, Vlad embarked upon a banning frenzy. An Orwellian sounding new "Law of Strengthening the Fight against Extremism in the Information Space", to tighten the rules for evil foreign publications (i.e., clamping down on any view not an echo of his own), is apparently being planned. A ban on internet alcohol advertisements is coming in (nope, thats not made up). A ban on unsanctioned public demonstrations (those in favour of Vlad of course being sanctioned) is already in place.

Vlad must have felt well pleased with all his handiwork. No foreign or unacceptable views on the internet, no public demonstrations against him and no more adverts for drunkenness. But then, earlier this year, a punk rock band went and spoilt it with an act of outrageous public indecency. The band, Pussy Riot (que gasps of shock in the Kremlin), sang a rude ditty about Vlad playing' uninvited we can assume' in the Cathedral of the Russian Orthodox Church. It took the form of a punk prayer, asking the Holy Mother rid them all of Putin. Pussy Riot also took a pot shot at the Orthodox Patriarch, Krill, one of Vlad's toadys. Krill called the performance “blasphemous” – well, it’s certainly a bit disjointed and discordant, but there again, its punk. Perhaps Krill, like Vlad, doesn’t like Punk very much. Quite what the outraged Patriarch must have made of the band’s name, history hasn’t yet related although we can probably guess.

Putin’s answer to this challenge is to put them in the dock and then, no doubt, apply some pressure to the court to have them locked up for about 7 years, all for singing a song. Why Putin objects so much to Pussy Riot is a mystery. Perhaps it’s because their name offends his conservative sensibilities. Perhaps it’s because, as an ABBA fan, he finds it all a bit hard on the ear (by contrast Mr Medvedev is a Deep Purple fan–no argument about who wins the macho musical contest there then). No – it’s more likely because, like anyone else who publically annoys him (oligarchs, businessmen closing factories, small neighbouring countries etc.), Putin’s default response is to crush and humiliate.  Dealing with a couple of naughty girls singing rude song was going to be small beer. But, it’s not going to plan like it would have even just a few years ago.

Firstly, thousands of the Church’s followers, other believers and atheists signed a petition to Patriarch Kirill, asking him to stand up for the girls. Then the whole thing has gone viral online, on TV and in the international print media. Predictably, it’s getting millions of hits on YouTube, the following being a small selection:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uptv4ubOr_k&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdcyDZ4bsY8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uptv4ubOr_k&feature=related

Putin seems incapable of grasping just how the world is changing. He is being globally humiliated by sticking by his murderous chum in Syria. He is despised by more and more of his own people. He doesn’t understand how the world has become interconnected and what this means both for individuals and nations in terms of liberty, information and the virtual dissolution of borders. He tries to ban views dissenting from his own - he may as well ban the sun from rising.

His Russia is fast disappearing. It is no longer a docile, subservient union, silently going along with the abuses of its leaders. A new, restive Russia is growing in its place in which there is no place for leaders longing for the days of the cold war, wishing they were “back in the USSR”. Putin is fast becoming a man out of his time and a nasty reminder of a fading era.

There is much talk about the Arab spring, but Putin may have inadvertently turned Pussy Riot’s song into the soundtrack of Russia’s own spring.

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Taliban Justice

A few days ago horrific footage of an Afghan woman being shot dead by the Taliban was broadcast on television and the internet. Her alleged crime? Adultery. Whether she had any trial (or what kind of sordid excuse for a hearing this takes under Taliban law) is irrelevant.  Perhaps all that was required was for a bearded accuser to make an allegation?

There she knelt, or crouched, in a final pose almost too painful to watch, bent in the dirt and the heat before her merciless executioners. She was the wife of a local Taliban leader. Or something. It scarcely matters. Some of the turbaned heroes were caught on film, pitiless smiles, grinning. A crowd had gathered, perhaps in expectation of some light entertainment to relieve the monotony of another long, hot and pointless day in a world trapped in the intellectual dark ages.

A couple of Kalashnikov shots rang out. Footage swept quickly over a crumpled form, motionless in the grainy dust. Some more smiles and another execution. She was not the first by a long way. There will be many more.

It is quite difficult to describe the people who live by this sort of code where a defenceless, probably innocent woman, is shot for something only slightly more than sport. Without resorting to pointless expletives, they are despicable and barbaric. They are intellectually diseased. They are poisoned by a kind of viral psychosis, imprisoned in a twisted wicked philosophy that defies the modern world and which is frighteningly resilient. They have been bombed, shot, “droned” and hunted down. Yet, like some deadly tide, they wash back, like a mutating virus resistant to all attack, they reappear.

At roughly the same time a mega conference was being held in Japan about the future of Afghanistan. Deep pocketed worthies (or at least big talking worthies) pledged support to poor Afghanistan as it writhed in its agony of being torn between worlds that are centuries apart. The US Secretary of State pledged the US to stand side by side with its new best friend in the glowing future of the years ahead. What else could she say?

And with those fine words comes that horrible juxtaposition – the twisted body of an executed woman in the bloodied dust and the echoes of the fine words and ghostly platitudes of fading “friends”, heading for the exits.

Afghanistan will, once again be left to its fate. Its future, more likely than not, lies in its past. Once again, the long shadow of the dark ages prevails.

See earlier blog The long shadow of dark ages.

Saturday, 23 June 2012

THE VERY STRANGE CASE OF MR JULIAN ASSANGE.

I must be upfront to start with.  I have never been able to warm to Mr Assange. Perhaps it’s the smooth silky soft spoken delivery or the ghost of a perpetual half smirk as he piously intones about the moral failings of those allegedly ranged against him. Perhaps it's when he tries to explain why he should not face those who accuse him of rape.

Mr Assange is the great exposer. He is Mr Wikileaks who allowed the bright light of day to shine on the dark and murky goings on in those vast and sinister organisations like the CIA and the US military.

Having riveted and bolted himself to the moral high ground, Mr Assange has successfully cast himself as the champion of openness who is now being persecuted for daring to allow the truth to emerge and for taking on institutions vastly more powerful than he. For him, nothing is more important that exposing the truth for all to see. No one expected Mr Assange to have any caveats around that, after all, as a result of the leaks he orchestrated, people lost their lives, some in very unpleasant circumstances. But Mr Assange could not be shaken from the rock of his self-righteousness, someone else was to blame for that, not him.

And then, slowly, it started going wrong.  Two Swedish women claimed he sexually assaulted them when in Stockholm. Most reasonable people would have assumed that, facing such clearly outrageous accusations, Saint Assange would have rushed back to Sweden to clear his name so unfairly impugned by these wicked, deluded hussies. But no, Mr Assange was having none of that. It was obviously a put-up job. Taking on a view shared by the mullahs in Iran, Saint Assange claimed this was all a plot by the evil empire otherwise known as America. The US wants to extradite him, put him on trial and then execute him for leaking all their secrets, so he would have us believe.  I am not sure if he thinks aliens are involved, but clearly he wants us to think very dark forces are moving against him.

Nope, said the Swedes, it’s not a put up job…we want you to answer these accusations of sexual assault. But, whilst transparency is evidently good for everyone else, Mr Assange believes he is exempt from this annoying provision of justice. He has tried every legal trick in the book to avoid the UK extraditing him to Sweden where he will have to face his accusers. A long list of suitably outraged and high profile backers posted bail for their man, none evidently too concerned about the actual accusations of assault against their hero…that it was all an American inspired plot was an easy explanation to soothe away any doubts that the angelic Mr Assange might not be quite and pure as he makes out.

The wheels of British justice grind very slow…but they grind. They drew the completely unsurprising conclusion that Mr Assange’s mortality, not to mention his human rights, were not being put at risk by sending him to Sweden to answer sex assault charges. Dark legions from the US were not about to descend upon him…and anyway, even if they were, he would be just as well off in calm, civilised Sweden as he would be in London.
 
But Mr Assange is remarkably reluctant to leave the UK. Perhaps it’s because he has tickets for the beach volleyball event at the London Olympics, but somehow I doubt that’s foremost in his mind at the moment. He has now fled to the Ecuadorian embassy….seeking political asylum. From exactly what is not too clear, but presumably allegations of sexual assault don’t qualify. Some of his highest profile backers are now having second thoughts too. Jemima Khan wants him to face the accusations of rape now saying that his accusers also have a right to a response. Apparently Assange thinks otherwise.

Perhaps the US is still simmering with rage and does want to get its hands on him. No doubt they were humiliated by the leaks. Perhaps, notwithstanding that he is entering a bitter presidential re-election campaign, the naughty behaviour of Mr Assange is preoccupying Barack Obama’s thoughts to such an extent he wishes to divert the forces at his disposal to capturing our warrior of truth (er…that’s others’ truth, not his own of course). Perhaps Mr Assange genuinely believes he is the victim of a global manhunt and that he is only safe in London (or Ecuador). Perhaps he believes Sweden is in the back pocket of the US, perhaps he read it in the stars or heard it from an alien…perhaps this, perhaps that…perhaps those two women in Sweden making those “outrageous accusations” are actually telling the truth. 

Sunday, 20 May 2012

Pakistan to ban Twitter (and perhaps all other forms of communication?)

Pakistan has apparently banned the use of twitter due to its blasphemous content. Gasp – what dreadful thing was being tweeted? Well, Twitter was wickedly tweeting about a competition on Facebook involving caricatures of Mohammed (oh no, not again you may well ask).  Not sure why Pakistan hasn’t banned Facebook instead (whose shares opened at about $40 notwithstanding heavenly disapproval), but perhaps Facebook, now that they are listed and corporate, have to be more compliant in the face of righteous fury.

Perhaps Pakistan should consider banning pencils too. And while they are about it, evil pencil-sharpeners, drawing paper and pens too and all other tempting means by which people communicate non-verbally.  That would avoid any further blasphemous forms of communication and prevent people from daring to speak out about that which has been declared unspeakable.

Here is a quote from Salman Rushdie, who knows a thing or two about this sort of thing:

“The moment you declare a set of ideas to be immune from criticism, satire, derision, or contempt, freedom of thought becomes impossible.”

Sunday, 13 May 2012

Astrology - Debunking the nonsense….

Millions of people believe that practically everything about them, from the makeup of their personalities through to the events they will confront in their lives over the next 24 hours or months can, more or less, be foretold by the planets and stars.

I’ve always struggled with this. I mean, how it can possibly be that everything about a person can be foretold by the position of a lot of large stones and stars out there in space at the time of their birth. Makes no sense, in fact it’s so far-fetched and so devoid of a jot of any evidence to support it, that it must rank as one of the great hoaxes in history.
Trapped with its past?

Astrology has a very long history. It means the study or account of the stars, and its origins go back to ancient times. Initially it explained how the moon affected the tides and how the sun affected the seasons. All well and good. It all started getting a bit dodgy though when it moved from this into the area of horoscopes, relying upon human gullibility instead of celestial observation.
Astrology still largely treats the skies according to what was visible to the human eye at the time of Ancient Greeks and Babylonians.  Its Zodiac is unchanged over millennia. What about all the many new planets and other astronomical elements that have been discovered since and continue to be discovered? Surely they must have an impact upon the astrological affect?  What about black holes? What about near earth asteroids – presumably such potentially devastating phenomena would have quite an impact (excuse the pun) on horoscopes? (Just think of the impact they have had on Hollywood).
As a result, astrology has become a prisoner of its past – if it acknowledges that newly discovered planets and stars will affect its readings, in one stroke it automatically has to call into question its entire history of previous astrological predictions. Not so good for business or its credibility.

Consequently it must focus on finding ways in which it can’t be disproved, wrapping itself up in impenetrable pseudoscientific psychobabble.

How does it work?
I’ve always wondered that - just how does a planet affect my personality and the type of day I’m going to have? It makes no sense. Astrology birthed astronomy, but the child has been largely responsible for exposing its parent for the sham it is. No astrologer has ever been to explain how astrology works – just what is the extraordinary mechanism by which a planet, say, Jupiter, is able to exert an influence on you or I in our daily lives – what is the “it “ that is influencing us. Astrologists need to show some new law of nature at work. Some astrologists used to claim it was magnetism. But how does that affect events and behaviour? Besides, the pots and pans in your kitchen, your car engine or the change in your pocket, will exert more magnetic influence on you that a planet millions of miles away. Nope – that one falls at the first hurdle. There is no way it has yet been shown it can work.

Inconsistency and contradiction
Astrology is inconsistent – different astrologers give differing readings for the same event, contradicting each other. There is no properly controlled evidence of its reliability as a discipline. It cannot pass any properly controlled scientific test. 
Flawed assumption

Astrology’s key assumptions are also farcically flawed. Take Mars. Because it has iron oxide on its surface, Mars is seen as a red, “bloody” planet. Hence the easy association with aggressive and warlike character traits (Mars, the God of war etc.). This means that astrological predictions about daily events involving these character traits are a direct result of the fact that Mars has a lot of iron oxide on its surface.  Nope – I can’t really see much connection there either but I look forward to hearing about the relationship between Martian iron oxide and human conflict…….
Predicting the future doesn’t work

In short, astrology does not rely upon any of the laws of nature. It operates outside this, in the realm of pseudoscience.  It relies on the faith of its adherents, and its longevity is probably more to do with what is (or isn’t) going on inside its believers’ heads than what is happening out there in space or in the sequence of earthly events it purports to predict. Of course, a law of nature may suddenly be discovered which unexpectedly provides a basis to prove astrology works even if at some level. However, don’t hold your breath – as Carl Sagan said, extraordinary claims require extraordinary proof.
Ultimately though, astrology fails the first and most basic test- it does not work and that is because it is nonsense. Astrology did not predict 9/11 or the Fukushima nuclear meltdown. It did not proudly tell us in advance who would score the final goal in the last football world cup. It will not predict the next natural disaster and like any of us, it can only guess how Hussein Bolt will feel when he wakes up on the morning of the 100 meter final in the forthcoming  Olympics in July (excited I predict).
 
It can’t do what it says on the tin. This is because the future cannot be read, whether with astrology, tea leaves or tarot cards. You will not find out about what lies in wait for you by listening to David Ick or by consulting the Mayan calendar. The future does not yet exist –and any person or any discipline that says they have a secret or specially revealed, magical way of knowing what it holds, is lying to us and to themselves.

Sunday, 6 May 2012

Hollande is elected...French mad man to the fore?

They have elected a socialist. His name is Mr Hollande.

Run.

If you believe the press. Mr Hollande apparently believes the rich are evil and must be taxed heavily for their obvious sins. He taps effortlessly into that painful assumption that modern and new-fangled is somehow immoral and cheap (and probably a nasty import from perfidious Albion) and responsible for the fading dreams of Gallic grandeur. He would like them all to be living in some socialist post enlightenment idyll where no one works (well, others somewhere else must work but let’s not worry about that) and if you are not on holiday, then you should be retired early. Ok, I’m exaggerating…slightly.

As one paper put it recently, Mr Hollande has already promised to spend money he has not yet even been able to borrow. Such is the rock upon which most socialist dreams flounder. Socialism is a wonderful hypothesis, yet the facts of history don’t bear it out. Humans by nature are greedy hunter gatherers who have always sought to accumulate goods and material wealth. Whether we like it or not, it is Capitalism that syncs most closely with this very fundamental and consistent aspect of human behaviour. 

But, back to France – it is not in a good place. Its banks resemble a cosmic phenomenon, most notably in that they have black holes instead of healthy balance sheets and they are light years from recovering their injudicious loans (notably to places like Greece and Italy). Many of its best and brightest have semi-grated to places like London and other northern European capitals where the wish to work hard (i.e. more than 35 hours a week) is not viewed as a character flaw and from which they can train-it back home at weekends. As a nation they seem preoccupied with their seemingly waning international influence as De Gaullism moves from the sunset into the shadows.

It has also recently been usurped by a resurgent Germany as the “political mover and shaker” in the Eurozone.  For years it has worried about the real or imagined loss of its influence, the way its culture is besieged by a sea of shallow and vacuous Anglo American imports, with their transient trends, pop fashions and associated vulgarities. Let’s not even get on to those “illegal foreign wars” or the irresistible tide of the English language. And to add insult to injury, the Far East now rises like a burning ultra-competitive sun on France’s horizon generating dark talk of trade tariffs and protectionism.

So what do you do when faced with all these problems – it appears you elect a man whose plan to save your sinking ship of state is to make a few more strategically placed economic holes in the hull. 

Because they are in such debt but still want to live beyond their means, Mr Hollande will borrow more money that will grow the bloated public sector a bit more. This he says will be good for growth, which has the logic of saying that eating more hamburgers is good for growth, even if not the kind you really want.

He says he will tax the very rich very heavily. For all that it is largely empty rhetoric, this has gone down very well indeed. In France no one likes the rich, although everyone wants the good life cushioned with generous state welfare paid for by that mythical sector of society known as “someone else”. There is an irony, not delicious but bitter and cynical, of resenting the rich but wanting the State to fund a standard of living you can’t afford – a trait by no means limited to France alone. No such thing as a free lunch, eh?

On the tax question, Mr Hollande, with all his talk of taxation and spending, risks becoming preoccupied with wealth distribution, as opposed to wealth creation. Like most politicians keen on embellishing their credentials with easy hand-outs, he prefers to ignore the reality that the distribution of wealth without equal attention to its creation is disastrous. If he is not careful, he will kill off the “golden goose” leading ultimately to wealth destruction. Just as you can’t dig your way out of a hole, you cannot tax your way out of a deficit. Over-taxation is like a bad smell in a small room. Those who are able, head for the door. In this case, the rich head for the exits (taking their proverbial sacks of wealth with them of course) and go and live somewhere else more welcoming like London (which is something like the 7th largest French city now).

He will also placate the electorate with bland, reassuring speeches – he will apply a growth policy, as if he thinks this is like applying another layer of make-up. He will tell Germany that he is going to renegotiate the Eurozone fiscal stability pact that ensures austerity. What does he think this pact is – some local arrangement like the window cleaning contract at the Éllysée Palace? He may find there are a few problems with this. Germany likes its pact (and everyone else’s austerity). It likes its low inflation. The pact is also already agreed by France, which is thus at its mercy.

Yet, Mr Hollande tells the French that nothing is as bad as they say, it’s almost as if he is telling them that if they bury their heads deep enough in the sand, then they won’t be able to see it all those dark clouds above their heads and they can remain safe in the dream of a unique French way of life. Yet that is but a nostalgic yearning for what is now passed.  It is as if Hollande promises them a last glance over the nation’s hunching shoulders, back to the sunlit, halcyon days of a youth passed but irresistible in its recall.

So we await the miracle of socialist economics. Perhaps he also believes that the earth is flat; confirmation is pending….